Miracles

by Jackie Gvozdenovic

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Jackie Gvozdenovic

Both my children were miracles. When I was twenty-eight, I was told I wasn't producing enough oestrogen to have children. They said to me, "It's fertility pills or nothing." I said, "It'll be nothing, then. I don't want to have kids five at a time."

Mick, my husband, and I decided that we'd just get used to being childless. Not a happy prospect but we talked ourselves into it. We were both working at Wodonga meat works. Not a happy place for me. In 1993 my back was too sore for me to continue working there. As it turned out, that freed me up to do some better things. In 1994 my Dad fell ill with cancer. As I'd given up work I was able to travel from Wodonga to Narooma (on the NSW south coast) to be with him and Mum and help them out. Somehow, my body must have got back on track, because one of the weekends back home with Mick, I fell pregnant. When the doctors told me I was pregnant, I said, "You must be lying! Didn't you lot tell me it couldn't happen?"

Dad said, "You know you're gonna lose me, Jacky. This is somebody's way of replacing me."

Adam was born on 12th September, 1995, the day after Dad's birthday. Dad was in Sydney hospital having his third operation. I was in Wodonga, having an elective Caesarian section. I can tell you there were a lot of telephone calls going on between the two hospitals.

Adam was a perfect baby. Very relaxed. Slept through the night the minute he got home from hospital. We took him to meet his Grandpa (Papa to Adam) when he was two weeks old. It wasn't long before he was lying on the couch watching cricket with Papa. (Well, he was three months old then. ) Adam and I did lots of travelling backward and forward. Mick bought us a Ford station wagon so we'd be comfortable travelling. We had a German Shepherd, Rika, our travelling companion and guard dog.

I fell pregnant again when Adam was just over one year old. I remember it as a good time. Adam had turned one just after Papa turned 60. We'd had Adam christened that night. My Dad was well enough to travel and he and Mum drove down for it. They were good days. But I had a horrible pregnancy. I bled at 19 weeks. That was scary. It was Christmas and I was at Narooma. The Doctor's guess was that some of the placenta had moved. Anyway, the baby seemed to be fine. That was the main thing. It still wasn't nice. I had a lot of headaches and felt ill a lot of the time. My back really hurt a lot. Eventually I was diagnosed with a kidney infection and I had Hospital in the Home, and got put on a drip. I soon recovered. Got over all of that. I got involved in helping a friend get ready for her wedding. We only just made it. I went into labour just a week after the wedding.

The baby was three weeks early. I had an emergency Caesarian at 5:00 am. He was not quite 5lb, but seemed fine as they whisked him away while they tended to me - just like they did with Adam the last time. Except this time they kept me in recovery for an extra long time. I didn't know what was going on. Eventually they took me up to the ward. Then they wheeled my bed up to the nursery door where Mick was standing holding Jamie. He was in tears. He was a wreck. Wild, confused, upset. Totally frustrated. It seemed that the paediatrician had broken some technical news to him rather bluntly. "What's going on?" I demanded. The nurses wouldn't say anything. Mick said: "There's something wrong with the baby. He's a monkey baby or something".

I later found that the paediatrician had told Mick that the baby's got Trisomy 21. I know now that that's the Down syndrome chromosome abnormality but it seems like he didn't explain that bit. To this day I don't know where the monkey bit came from. Maybe one of the nurses said something about the baby's features. In the upset and confusion, it's hard to get things straight. The baby got put back in the nursery and Mick had to go and telephone my Mum and stuff. I was in the dark for the next couple of hours. Nobody would tell me anything.

I didn't get a good look at my baby until one o'clock in the afternoon. The nurse brought him in and put him in my arms and said, "You tell me if you can figure out what's wrong with him".

I held my beautiful little baby boy and had a good look at him for the first time. He had ten fingers and ten toes. He was very cute and his eyes were a bit slanty.

"Down syndrome," I said.

She said, "Yes. We think so. We're just waiting for the culture test to be verified".

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Jackie and Jamie Gvozdenovic

He was a gorgeous baby. I loved him. Adam saw him later that night. He was over the moon to have a baby brother. He said, "When can we take him home?" They still get on well today. Now Adam is seven and Jamie is five. Adam is extremely protective of him. Of course they have normal brotherly disagreements like which video is going to go on etc. But Adam just helps him so much with his therapy. Leading him and encouraging him on the trampoline, and with his alphabet and numbers. He explains what's happening on the TV, and talks to him about colours and so on. And he organises him so that they can get what they want for tea. It doesn't always work.

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