The morning routine. Autism. A sibling's story

by Karen Cozens

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Karen Cozens

down to a picture of Jacob

6:30 am - Jacob wakes up, so we all wake up. "Blue jumper, blue jumper", screams Jacob repeatedly. I search for his blue school jumper, I'm stressed in case I can't find it straight away (the neighbours need their sleep, too).

Josh searches for any jumper, he must be stressed too, but I have to keep him away from Jacob. Too late, Josh is now crying as Jacob has thrown a book at him. "Blue jumper, blue jumper", he wails. Josh is still crying, but I can't think about that just yet, I have to find his jumper. "Blue jumper, blue jumper", he screams. My husband wants some socks for work, Josh cries, Jacob screams, Brian is waiting...There's the jumper, my chest doesn't feel so tight anymore.

"Time to get dressed boys". Josh asks for help, but I can't help, it's going to take twenty minutes to dress Jacob. "You understand, don't you love?" Josh looks upset, but I can't deal with that just yet as Jacob is kicking and pulling my hair.

"Breakfast, boys". "I didn't want weetbix, Mum" says Josh. "You know Jacob only eats weetbix at the moment, and if you don't eat them he won't eat his, you know that, don't you?" Josh want sugar, but he'll have to wait, Jacob has just thrown his bowl downstairs. People walking past on the road stop and stare as he has just removed all his clothes as well. Tight chest again, take a breath..."Mum I need to read my book to you". "Not yet love, I need to get Jacob dressed".

"Come on Jacob, get dressed, the bus will be here soon". "No bus, no bus", he screams. "No bus, no bus", he cries as he tries to scratch my arms and pull at my hair and clothes. Toot toot. The bus arrives just as Jacob has pulled my shirt off completely. Don't cry, I tell myself as I try to put it on again. "No bus, no bus", Jacob screams as he throws his bag and clothes over the fence. Don't cry, I tell myself again as I straighten my hair and head towards the bus. Ron, our bus driver, looks concerned. "Everything OK, mate?" I take a breath. "I think I'll take him in this morning, Ron".

The bus drives off, I wish I was going somewhere on a bus. Anywhere would do. But good mothers don't think like that. Snap out of it, I tell myself.

Back up the steps, and I find Jacob has relieved himself all over his school clothes, but has his blue jumper on, backwards, but on.

"Mum, you're helping at my school this morning aren't you?" Josh looks at Jacob doubtfully. "I'm sorry mate, I have to drive Jacob to school now, you understand don't you?" "Sure", he says quietly and wanders off.

Oh god, its 8:30. "Come on Josh, in the car, you'll be late". "But mum, Jacob has no pants on". "It's OK, we'll get him dressed at school". "But mum, what if my friends see him?" "No school, no school", Jacob screams as he manages to scratch the side of Josh's face at the same time.

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Jacob Cozens

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Contact: Cooinda Family Support Group