A long and winding road of destruction

by Mum Anon

Over a year ago our son, who we will call Mr A, was a happy and healthy sixteen year old teenager who had everything. He had Mum, Dad, a sister, a nice home, good friends and he went to a good school. He was socially well adjusted and played sports. He had a part-time job and interacted well with others. Suddenly his world came crashing down. His school marks started slipping rapidly. He began cutting classes, weeks at a time. His best friend of many years left for a different school. We would not let our Mr A follow as we felt it would not be in his best interests. Mr A reacted with suicide attempts and constant threats of self-harm. Still we stood our ground. His friend only lasted one month at the new school, but Mr A lost his 'best friend' status. No phone calls, no visits, not anything. Our son became withdrawn and moody, mentally abusing us. Nothing we did or said would help him. He thought everyone hated him and everyone was out to hurt him. He had no self-esteem. His part-time job was a nightmare of the kind you might witness on A Current Affair or Today Tonight but he needed it to keep him going, to give him something to get out of bed for. The pressures on teenagers these days are far too demanding. Mr A dropped out of school. He had cracked, big time. He wanted to quit work, leave home and drop off the planet. We somehow managed to keep him at work but this was the only contact he had with the outside world. Otherwise, he lay in bed all day. His depression was getting worse. He ate everything in sight, stacked on two stone in weight, got pimples all over his body. He didn't bother to wash his hair much and he smelled and looked so unlike the beautiful boy we had known and loved. Our sweet, beautiful, 'normal' little boy had turned into a fat, lazy, dirty, messy, unlikable human being. He was lost in his own world, in a big scary black hole. I could see and feel him slipping further and further down, but I could not reach him. This pulled my heart out. I felt that I had failed him as a mother and a friend. Nothing I said seemed to compute in his confused brain. After a lot of heartache and contact with his school, friends, counselor and doctor I realised it was up to me.

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Contact: Cooinda Family Support Group